Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the United States, affecting 18.1% of the population every year. That’s nearly 1 in 4 people. You probably know someone who suffers from it; maybe it’s you. Do you feel a racing pulse sometimes, a tight chest, or feelings of “fight, flight, or freeze?” Anxiety disorders can develop from a complex set of risk factors, including genetics, personality, brain chemistry, and life events. Genetics? Yes, you read that correctly. It’s called “transgenerational epigenetic inheritance” or epigenetics.

Many individuals may be affected by a traumatic event or troubled life, and inherited emotions might have been transferred to you by one or both biological parents. Read on for some examples of emotions that can be inherited, then find out how you can lighten your emotional load.

Here’s an example of Amy’s anxiety. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt at peace. Her mind raced with worst-case scenarios, reliving past hurts over and over, and fortune-telling what everyone around her was thinking. She imagined what would happen if her husband died, or she died, or worse if something happened to one of her kids.

Her anxiety often resulted in panic attacks that would immediately shut her down for hours at a time. It was impossible for her to concentrate at work and she was shirking her responsibilities at home. Sadly, her marriage began to suffer.

A friend suggested she go to counseling, so she set an appointment. One of the therapist’s very first questions “Who else in your family suffers from anxiety?” surprised her. It had never occurred to Amy that her anxiety could have been passed down through the generations. She knew that her grandmother was so anxious she wouldn’t talk to people she didn’t know. Her brother had anxiety about taking a test, her nephew had social anxiety, and her aunt had perfectionist anxiety.

Anxiety is one emotion that is can be passed down from one generation to the next. But these 10 emotions can also be inherited through family trauma, parental modeling, and/or abusive behaviors.

1. Anger. There are three main types of unhealthy anger: aggressive anger, passive-aggressive anger, and suppressive anger – all of which can negatively affect a child. For example, if a parent is aggressively angry by yelling, their child might grow up to mimic the same behavior or learn to redirect it into their own manifestation of anger.
2. Shame. Shaming words from parents such as, “You will never be good enough,” or “You are stupid,” attack the heart of who a person is. Sadly enough, shaming tactics are pervasive in hyper-religious homes where a child is told that they have to live up to some unrealistic standard and very frequently are practiced by the child on others once they have been exposed to such treatment.
3. Guilt. Guilt-tripping is a long-standing tradition in many families. Statements including, “If you loved me you would clean the kitchen,” or “A daughter who cares about her mom calls her,” are typical examples of a parent using guilt as leverage. This behavior, though typical, is still considered an extreme form of manipulation.
4. Helplessness. Think of this idea as playing the role of the victim. In this instance, a parent uses their past trauma as an excuse for poor behavior: “I drink every night because your mother left me,” or “It’s because I was abandoned as a kid that I act so crazy.” Kids, who are always looking for excuses to justify their poor choices, pick up on this and customize the trait to benefit themselves.
5. Anxiety. Anxiety is a helpful emotion that is meant to be a warning light for your brain or body, almost like the low fuel gauge in your car. This feeling is only supposed to be triggered as a precursor to fear. However, some people’s anxiety misfires causing it to go off too frequently and create an unhealthy environment for the ones suffering from it and those around them.
6. Insecurity. A primary developmental tactic used by children is their tendency to study their parents in an effort to learn more about themselves. The problem with this method of self-discovery is that, more often than not, the child will also absorb a parent’s insecurities. An insecurity that causes a parent to not go for a promotion out of fear can easily translate into a child who will now decide to not audition for a play.
7. Selfishness. This is most commonly seen in families where a child has not attached to a parent because the parent doesn’t want to or can’t attach onto their child. In the early stages of development, trust is essential and any failure to establish that causes attachment issues. In turn, these issues lead to selfish and individually centered behaviors.
8. Criticism. Continually picking a child apart for what they wear, how they look, how they perform, or who they hang out with is exhausting. Especially when these critiques are sandwiched with, “I only do this because I love you.” For a child who grows up listening to this, being critical and judgmental of others now seems like a loving thing to do. It is not. In fact, it only succeeds at tearing relationships apart.
9. Isolation. People isolate themselves for different reasons: fear, depression, sadness, grief, and paranoia. Instead of confronting these very uncomfortable emotions, a person isolates or hides from them. Done often enough by a parent, children will come to believe that this is a reasonable way of coping and do the same once they become adults. Breaking the habit of isolation means confronting the painful emotions, traumas, and/or abuses, and no longer hiding from yourself and others.
10. Jealousy. “Our family is the jealous type,” is an excuse that some use to justify their poor reactions of lashing out, name-calling, or picking a fight. But acting inappropriately because a person feels jealous is never an excuse and certainly shouldn’t be encouraged in children. No one wants to get hurt, but hurting others before they can hurt you is immature behavior.

You can inherit any of these negative emotions: anger, depression, shame, guilt, frustration, and more. In fact, lots of times these inherited emotions are so deeply buried that it may be hard for you to put an exact name to them. Perhaps while you were reading this, you had an “ah-ha” moment. I did.

Fortunately, you don’t have to know how the emotion got started in your family, and you don’t have to name it in order to free yourself from it. Trapped emotions can block people from love and happiness and make them feel disconnected from others. Releasing trapped emotions makes conditions right so your body can heal. When you release Inherited Emotions from yourself, everyone in the generational line that was affected, will heal as well.

Tom will be discussing more about Inherited Emotions at his MasterMind Class this Thursday, March 12. If your curiosity is peaked, join him for this free online class via Zoom at 7pm Central (5pm PST, 6pm MST, 8pm EST). https://zoom.us/j/891370699 If you can’t make it watch the replay on healersresource.com (There’s LOTS of other classes there too.)

I hope you’ll enjoy hearing from me once in a while too. (P.S. I’m Tom’s wife) I think this work is fascinating. Tom would love for me to learn how to be a practitioner, but that’s what I’ve got him for, right? If you need him like I do, make an appointment at www.thebodyemotions.com

Laurel Heintz  
The Practitioner’s Wife

10 Emotions that Can Be Unintentionally Inherited by Children https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhausted-woman/2018/07/10-emotions-that-can-be-unintentionally-inherited-by-children/

Anxiety Relief through Energy Healing https://discoverhealing.com/?s=anxiety&lang=en

Statistics https://adaa.org/about-adaa/press-room/facts-statistics

Christine M. Hammond is a Counselor with over 15 years of experience in counseling, teaching, and ministry.  Read more about Christine at https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/christine-m-hammond-winter-park-fl/97122